does anyone understand at all ?

Were you ever ultimately crazy about someone ? Did that someone light up your day when ever you two would talk ? Would you ever get butterflies or go red when you two would hug ? Was there ever a certain someone on your mind almost 24/7 ? Did you ever want to tell that someone how you felt but you were afraid of rejection or were you afraid that things would never be the same ? Was that someone into someone else ?

I'm going down that road at the moment. I'm not sure what to do either, give up or keep trying ? I'm at the point where i want to break down and start crying 'cause i know i've most likely lost the fight for that special someone. Some of my friends say i should let it be 'cause that might be the best thing to do but it's so hard to let go, especially when your feelings are strong and it's felt like this for a while now. But the other half of my friends say i should keep trying 'cause there's a chance for everyone. The state i'm in now i don't know who to listen to. It's a matter of win or lose. I don't want to lose but that may be the case and i would just have to accept what has happened. A friend of mine told me a saying:


Grant me the strength to accept the things that i cannot change, the courage to change the things that i can, and the wisdom to know the difference. If i do nothing i'll regret it.

I'm not too certain if i should follow the saying or not, but i'll see what fate will leave me. Hopefully it'll be a treat.


AND AND
if anyone else is feeling like how i am, i'm sure you'll do the right thing if you search yourself and find the answer. I'll be by your side no matter what happens, 'cause i know how you feel.


that's all...
have a good one.
iloveyouuu.

P.S please give advice, okay thanks. :]

so it begins. :]

Well for starters welcome to who ever is reading this. I'm Kayla and DON'T forget it, it would be so great if you didn't. Uhh yeah you are on my page for the very first time isn't that just exciting ?! :] bahaha well im not here for fun and games, this shit is serious. Like dead serious... ;] I'm only joking. Because this is my first blog i want you to get to know me, you know 'cause that's how it works. You would only know that if you're as smart as me. ;]

Kayla Jasmine Eilleen Flentjar is the name but preferred to be known as kayla payla. My birthday is the 9th of November, a very special day for me.
As others would say im loving, outgoing, energetic, wise and thoughtful, always thinking of others before myself, a real go-getter, clever and witty and i love to make others smile and laugh. :] Hopefully you can agree with them,
I love my friends and family but can also hate their guts.
Going hyper is one of my specialties but there are my days where i can't be bothered doing anything at all.
My favourite sport is soccer to the max but i can hate it.
I like to play the 360 but can hate how i suck at it.
Books are a rare thing for me to do in my spare time unless im forced.
I don't like bitches but im good at being one.
I can keep promises.
I don't like bragging but i do it anyways.
I like to dance, a lot.
Cannot leave the house without my make-up on.
I care too much for my hair.
I don't have the highest grades but could do better.
Etc.


I think you've heard enough of that as i could go on and on forever. Which wouldn't be necessary to be honest. Maybe you haven't heard enough of me and if you wanna chat zeke@westnet.com.au or even www.myspace.com/pretti_blonde_101 but dont use it for your wrong desires. If you've heard enough of me then why are you still on my page ? Jeeze people these days with no common sense. :] And just before i go i would like to say a few words about my mysterious, sexy, BESTEST twin i could ever have...


KURT BARBARICH ; :]

Ahhhhh what shall i say about this so called "little boy" ? More like half grown man. :]
No he's not my biological twin but we do have connections that could make a possibility.
I have known this amazing fella since 2008 and i must say he has grown on me.
Yeah he can be a pain in the ass but you can never have enough of him.
He's always there for me when im feeling down.
Apparently he can read my mind.
He trys to help me get out of my own mess.
Him and i have had some whacky conversations that i will never forget.
He has been my pet turtle since i've met him.
He knows EVERYTHING about me, even stuff i don't know about myself.
It's like "woaaah, what a gun !" when it comes to him and sport.
He's my human wikipedia cause he's such a nerd.
When i first saw him i was thinking "DAMN ! where's the line to get a slice of that ?!"
I know his secrets and he knows mine.
He's my best friend
AND AND
God i love him. ♥






Im gonna leave you, leave you hanging for the next blog now considering i still haven't had my shower. Silly girlie. :]
Good night !! xoxo
iloveyouuuu. ♥


P.S I would like to say happy birthday to Jeneva Jones. She has turned 14 and i congratulate her but deep down inside i envy her so much. I love you hottieeee. :]